Life Journey Shares

Why are you Deleting Facebook?

Where do I start? The answer is simply this: Why keep Facebook when you get shut down and can’t use the platform every couple of months? They’re literally shutting me down for 30 days for a posted note that was private, on my own personal page, posted over a month ago. Nobody could even see it except me. To top it off? It was a facetious joke towards a workplace situation dealing with the dry and crude humor I was dealing with from men in the workplace. So much for empowering women. So much for keeping us connected too. I’m over this platform and its nonsense overbearing influences on my relationships. Half my posts hardly get out to family or friends as they’re clueless every time about my allergy posts saying they never see it.

It’s run by ‘bots’ that dictate whether or not you are in line with community standards. These bots have no idea what context is nor do they understand dry and dark humor. Even if you share something to your wall with a privacy setting to only yourself – it can be grounds for them to freeze you and shut your voice down for a number of days. That’s actually what has happened and is my final straw going into 2022. I’m done with it. Facebook is fired. The trendsetting and everything they do. Fired from me. I was almost done with it when they silenced Trump and a number of other folks. In light of freedom to run your platform how you please, I guess it’s okay to kick a few loud-mouthed opinionated political figures off the platform, even though they had some valid points and influence. Kind of scary to really debate that debauchery. 

I’ve had many battles with them over my crude humor on my personal page and posts in groups I have been in. Now that I’m on their radar, they’re looking at me with an extra fine-tooth comb more often than others. 

Why am I going to stay on a platform and have to fight to stay on it and be able to post or be heard? It seems a little more than over the top to silence people on a platform meant to ‘connect’ people. I have for the longest time held onto facebook simply for my corn allergy group access for information, but even that is a bit stressful with how manipulative the search bar can be on that app. My husband is in that group and can search for anything I need in that group. I actually kind of hate being cornered to Facebook to connect with people who have similar problems. I’d like to find something more local to accommodate the need for acceptance and inclusion as a human. This virtual world seems like a real waste of time considering how much time I actually need to be spending cooking, cleaning, gardening, fishing, working, and dealing with routine issues and activities. 

I’ve been having issues on and off for about 3 years with Facebook and their bots. I’m not willing to waste the time jumping through hoops to talk to a person on Facebook who doesn’t have a clue any more than their bots do, and in all honesty, why in the world do we have a need for bots with an employee shortage? If people need to get paid to do something and don’t want to leave their homes and want to stay home scrolling online, why not hire them? That’d be more effective than having an AI program running the platform and it would help our economy out somehow I’m sure. Just my two cents on the matter – being rather sarcastic though on all of that.  

There are a number of things getting skewed and manipulated on social media and with that being said, I’ll tell you and everyone wondering why I’m deleting to go watch this documentary on Netflix. I’ve told many people to go on Netflix and watch the Social Dilemma – it’ll explain a little more about what Facebook and other ‘free’ social networking platforms are actually doing. The damages done to our social climate are all but obvious and irreversible at this point I think, especially with the number of people fooled into believing this is the only way to stay connected with friends and family. I’ve had several argue me not to remove my social media accounts. I’ll tell you, my days are numbered either way because I don’t agree with their narrative, and freedom of speech is all but getting publically hung by everyone saying they value it. 

As I was telling my friends, the way the algorithms work, I’m not getting any traction anyway because I don’t agree with mandating vaccines for COVID and I don’t support any of the big companies that won’t take a corn allergy into consideration when making their products. They’d rather me shut up and die. All this talk on social media about mental health awareness and all this other stuff on inclusion this or that… it’s a little taxing and hypocritical. Even those I consider pretty close to me are rather clueless when they start toting these virtue-signaling statements that connote changes but bring forth no fruition to actual changes occurring in society other than perpetuating an ever-evolving and turbulent social climate. I don’t speak in a way that pleases everyone either. It’s not my forte. What can I say? I wasn’t born a public speaker or influencer. I just like to be ‘mouthy’ as I’ve been told but moreover, I like to be helpful where I can in the most honest way I can – being my authentic self the entire time. 

So there’s the answer. I’m done fighting with the bots, I’m not going to start a new Facebook page and email up every time they block me. I’m going to bring everything right here to my website. With all this being said… You can bank on things shifting around on my website in the upcoming months… as if there isn’t a mountain in front of this change of things that I need to get done already. 

I’ll continue posting on Instagram and Facebook Business for now through Instagram and their business tools, this will be coming to a halt as my personal accounts are deleted – permanently. Not just deactivated, deleted. Permanently. I will not be starting another one up if I absolutely do not need to for business purposes. So long as the bots leave my Instagram account alone, that’ll be up for a good amount of time. My intention however is to remove myself from these platforms and take my freedom of speech to my own website where no bots can dictate and misunderstand me and then silence me when it’s the time we are all connecting the most. 

Life Journey Lessons & Corn Allergy Life, Life Journey Shares

Thanksgiving & Corn Allergy

First, I’d like to kick this off with a big ole’ Happy Thanksgiving to everyone out there who celebrates and enjoys this holiday with friends and family. I especially want to applaud and give mad respect to those with food allergies who still brave the so called ‘norms’ of social gatherings and deal with the interactions seamlessly and effortlessly. You are a role model and should most definitely provide your perspectives and experiences on how you got to that level. I think we’re all different and develop and struggle through things on different levels but that we are all capable of shifting on this spectrum of perception and life that we share. May your thanksgiving and holiday season be filled with lots of love, laughter, joy and more. 

Secondly, I want to say I hope that everyone finds time to be thankful, no matter your situation this time of year. The holidays can be hard for many of us. I especially understand this as a difficult time of year for myself, between deaths, empty chairs around the table growing each year and my allergy development in my early twenties to what I would now say a pretty bleak social life to nonexistent family life outside my and my husbands interactions… I can honestly say I don’t really personally care for Thanksgiving or the holiday season itself. I have a litany of fond and warm memories though that I cherish and while this Thanksgiving will be spent working at the grocery store and dodging any invitations to social gatherings, I am more than than thankful for my life as it is regardless of the trials, setbacks, strife, mishaps, or what have yous of anything considered the negative. It is perfect just the way it is and it will continue to improve in all it’s perfections. Challenges are blessings in disguise and any mountain I must climb will be an adventure to be made fun of, even if I’ve almost lost my life over a few of my mountains before, I’m sure they won’t be the last. 

For this post I want to share from my personal perspective and journey, seeing as it seems to be a thing every year in my allergy support groups for people to come express their tragedies with dealing with family or friends who are seemingly just committed to misunderstanding our food allergies, the nightmares of getting poisoned by a spouse or other family member. These moments of betrayal, isolation, rejection and even accusations of being a hypochondriac or something else other than your doctor diagnosed allergy. They’re all more than troublesome on the minds of those who undergo it. We are all different in how we handle these situations though. I’m aiming to power through these moments humbly and kindly, but as of right now, I’m a bit bitter and I know I am. It’s okay though, I have a right to be. We all do at some point. It’s part of a grievance process. I want to remind everyone that you’re not alone in your troubles, somebody somewhere is dealing with something very similar. Stay strong, you will get through it. This moment will pass and you will triumph and learn from it. 

Thanksgiving used to be one of my favorite social gathering times of the year. We get to load up on booze, food and music or good shows are never in short over at family or friends houses. Games and more. Each year since my allergy though, my circle has died down more and more. We’re herd animals afterall, and if someone doesn’t fit in with the crowd – they tend to step off on their own if the crowd doesn’t shun them out one way or another. Having a corn allergy in my early 20’s after having established 80% of my life long connections, has been beyond difficult. The attitude of my given circle wasn’t allergy friendly nor tolerant and even I had an identity crisis at many points through adapting to the necessities to achieve feeling better and getting my health back from this allergy and intolerance. My doctor even gets hopeless with me when it comes to treating certain situations, the pharmacist too – both scratching their heads not knowing what to do or how to treat or get treatment that’s both accommodating and affordable for something as simple as a skin infection that doesn’t have some level of allergy trigger consequence to it. When my herbal remedies and research comes up empty in results and I have to turn to them, it’s an uh-oh kind of situation. I hope to see this die down as time goes on and technological or scientific advancements are made. Sometimes they can really help guide me, other times we’re all left scratching our heads on what to do to help my situation without causing other problems treating the one. 

Others with a corn allergy probably understand this, some are blessed to have a great doctor and pharmacist as well as resources and support. I’m not so lucky in this aspect to some perspectives – even my own. I count my blessings though that I have the resources and support that I do. I will not waste my energy wishing I had better or being jealous of others online and their boasts about getting a cooperative doctor or supportive father-n-law. I have a great naturopath to lean on for advice and while my father-n-law is not even remotely emotionally supportive or understanding of my allergy and has literally poisoned me at a past thanksgiving gathering only to laugh about it and taunt me hours afterward as I’m puking in their bathroom – he does help us with things around the house when it comes down to repairs for it or our cars. His strong suit is not keeping us healthy or safe feeling, but mobile and independent. 

My viewpoint on this seeming to be atrocious behavior from my father-n-law though? Glass is always half full – Everyone has their strengths, know them, play on those to get the best results of any situation. Don’t go to a thanksgiving dinner and eat with them if I can’t bring my own food and be prepared mentally for the taunting – as they’re just playing in their minds and its nothing short of a fight to make a deal about it – play along and dismiss it, do what I have to do, wear my mask or stay outside and eat my own food I bring, I can make my appearance if I want to and it’s that simple. I can also choose to have a good time there as well so long as I don’t expect them to be someone they’re not and expect their lifestyle to be in line with mine for my comfort. Misery and unhappiness is a direct result of expecting things to be different and not accepting things as they are. The second you start expecting a fish to fly like a seagull or a seagull to swim and hunt like a dolphin, you’re living in a fantasy world. People are people and are exactly what they show you. Some can change, if they want to, but many will remain exactly the same throughout most of their lifetime. It makes no sense to spend a lot of time and effort fighting people on what they are after they’ve shown you.

My point on this post is in summary right here. Thanksgiving is supposed to be a lot of things in image and in mind as well as in tradition. For some of us though, it is not what is in the standard mental picture frame taught to us growing up. Happiness is always with something or someone else. Our health is someone elses responsibility, our food safety, our products, etc. All of it. Nothing is ever what it seems and only what you make it out to be at the end of the day. We’re all limited to our own views and perceptions of our own experiences, sometimes we are able to read or hear something and it shifts us in ways that are profound. I hope that what I share here, can help some of us who struggle with these holidays and the allergy can find a shift from obstacles and misery to acceptance and happiness. 

I’m not saying be a pushover, for sure, do stand up for yourself if a situation arises. My situation with my father-n-law poisoning me at a past thanksgiving was a deal over sour cream brand used in mashed potatoes. I did not take the time to double check the ingredients used to make homemade mashed potatoes. I can tolerate Daisy Sour Cream, all other brands I cannot. He used potatoes, sea salt, black pepper and sour cream. I asked but did not check for myself, what brand, and literally asked him, “Did you use the Daisy brand sour cream?” to which he responded, “Yes.” and it wasn’t until we were midway through eating that my stomach started flipping.  My husband, not sure what could have possibly been the problem got up to double check his father as I was excusing myself to the bathroom. Come to find out, he had actually used the cheap kroger brand in the potatoes. His dad was chuckling and laughing and making jokes of the situation as I spent an hour emptying my stomach. Gasping for air. Wishing I was anywhere but there. I had brought over 3 homemade, corn allergy friendly, delicious pumpkin pies that his father even took delight in, 2 were for them that day. My response to all the taunting and lack of care? I’ll be damned if you get my pies now!!! My husband took me home as soon as we had a break and had no problem backing me up on taking those pies back home as a punishment. Sorry, mom! You weren’t the offender but you get punished too, you can come by if you want a slice of this homemade pumpkin pie though! And that’s how I handled that situation. I won’t ever again let someone else cook for me. That was a lesson on personal responsibility for me. I waste no time playing victim more than a day – it’s their fault until I realize it’s all my fault, every bit of it. We take risks in trusting people on any level and when that trust gets violated, it is our responsibility to act accordingly without blame. People are people. You’re a person too and do the same kinds of things in different ways on different levels of the spectrum we all live on and share. 

I’ve had friends try and offer to assemble a thanksgiving dinner under my direction with no serious dedication to looking into what they have to do on their part for such a feat, which is a lot to ask of me. I have a hard enough time in my own kitchen and am having to constantly research every step I make in the kitchen. They were flat out offended when I kept declining to let them assemble my food and then when I did give instruction and guidance, they were still confused so I settled on I’ll bring my own food, and told them don’t take offense if I don’t touch your food. Their pride got in the way and it crumbled connections between us. I take no pity on their lack of understanding of my situation and its complexity as they are the same kind of people my father-in-law is – they’ll make jokes and facetious jests about suicide being an option for me – I have distanced myself from these kinds of people. My thoughts to them: Your kitchen is filled with McCormick seasonings and regular-ass American-style typical chemical-laden cooking crap – none of it is safe for me! Don’t take it personally and if you do, not my problem. I gotta look out for me! 

My point here is, take care of yourself first. Deal with your health the best way that you know-how and learn how to be as independent as you possibly can. I’ve been learning how to hunt, fish, shoot, garden, and cook. I’m juggling all of this with 5 animals, a fish tank, a part-time job, design contracts, and plenty of old trauma work I’m working through. The health complications and setbacks are just setups for something better coming up. Life is getting better and things aren’t always as bad as they seem. No matter where you are on your journey with this allergy or just discovering this allergy with a loved one, things are only as hard as we make them. Just start and keep doing what works best for you and don’t worry about the rest. It will fall into place! 

While I am not celebrating this year, I am planning to in the future. Right now I am struggling to get organized and set up in our new home and things seem more complex than ever, but we are most definitely maneuvering in the right direction. I hope that by this time next year, I can have recipes available and out for folks to use with this allergy – of course, the products and their sources will vary from person to person with a corn allergy but at least I can share what is working for me, some of it may be great ideas for those who are struggling to figure it out. As we all work through the process of getting used to a different lifestyle and trying to streamline some things – we are learning new things each day as new complications and obstacles arise.

I just hope this article helps some of you understand that there is a grievance process to this allergy and an adaptation socially. Your circle will shift. If you find yourself with no friends and even your family seems like enemies – I can relate. Most of my family is 3k miles away, don’t care, and won’t even click a link to sign a petition on behalf of all corn allergy sufferers to make labeling a thing for us. When I go to visit, I am bombarded with a combination of hugs and facetious comments toward the allergy and my lack of ‘meat on the bones’ because it has caused me to lose every bit of weight I ever had. I don’t foresee me getting it back either with the dietary restrictions. I have hardly any of the same friends I had when I discovered this allergy and quite frankly, that’s okay. It hurts, yes, and I miss the good times we had but with the differences, I can understand and accept that things shifted for the better. Some people stay connected with me at a distance and still root for me and I absolutely love this. I limit my time with some of my friends for some of the attitudes and perceptions, only because it is something I am still struggling with accepting. Yes, I want some lay’s chips too, but I cannot. Taunting makes it harder and avoiding that is simple. I’ve shifted most, if not all, my social interactions around fishing now. It is double beneficial, I get to hang out with friends in the outdoors and catch food. One of my best of friends has done everything he can to teach me how to fish for myself and even got me geared up towards hunting which I am now jumping into. I’ve focused on shifting my time used to research and action rather than wallowing and reactions and trying to gain social traction for a very small group of people. I’m not shutting up though, I mean, I still tell everyone at every opportunity they’re being fooled by food and pharma industries and that I don’t think my allergy development was natural and even if it were, it was a blessing from God himself to take me out of the brainwashing fog that so many people are sheepled into. Shifting my focus from external validations to internal ones. It’s not an easy process as none of us are really brought up to focus on ourselves so much as we are to focus on getting accepted and making our way in the world via a career and social status. We will always do more for others than we will for ourselves and it is more out of our own selfish desires to be accepted and recognized as important on some level, it is human nature.

I appreciate those who have supported me along the way and taught me what I have come to learn now. Those who follow and wait for my posts, thank you. I know it’s been quiet here. I’ve been busy as I mentioned though, focused on action rather than reaction. As I start gaining my momentum again and get myself organized through the holiday craze in retail, I will be making more posts. This year has been a year of recovering for me and while I am not doing Thanksgiving this year, I wish everyone else a very good one and if you’re like me this year, I hope you see the glass half full and all the opportunities and blessings hidden inside this obstacle that is a corn allergy development.

Life Journey Lessons & Corn Allergy Life, Real Life Journey History

Getting back up and going again…

It’s been a long while since I last posted. Getting back up and going has been hard for me this past year. There’s been a lot to learn for me, fishing, having trouble with my garden and relationships as well. My marriage was on the rocks earlier this year but with a lot of support from a really good friend, I’ve bounced back and we’re doing well again. Operating as a team like all couples should. Needless to say, a whole lot has been going on for me. I’ve been recovering and regaining strength from malnourishment from refusal to eat until after I got surgery to help alleviate the backlash and consequences from the many reactions and bathroom runs I ended up going through in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic shutdowns. Good Food sources were limited and working in the grocery store at the time everyone was wiping the shelves clean of products – the demand for my presence was high which took my time away from cooking for myself and doing my garden. We had just bought a new house too in the midst of the pandemic shutdowns. I felt I didn’t have the time, but moreover, the reality in taking personal accountability, I didn’t take and make the time to process my own safe food. I fell for the “Be a hero, eat at your local restaurants. Support them.” thing. While my intentions to help local businesses were genuine, I never communicated clearly to them that the food needed to be prepared a certain way. As a prior food service worker myself, there’s nothing more annoying than someone with a complicated allergy coming into your establishment and expecting you to be the expert on their allergy issues. Lawsuit hungry people are what I was taught these people were until I gained my own allergy and suddenly got a more than humbling lifestyle shift. People with allergies just want some convenience and time-saving options too. Not someone to sue for a reaction. People with allergies have a lot they have to really look out for, especially food allergies. They also get no real convenience that your common ‘normal’ person has. I know this now and boy is karma quite a server.

I’m just now finally getting myself back online again and focused on my Corn-Tamination series or corn allergy awareness graphics on social media. I’m back up working harder and longer hours at the grocery store again, all night shifts though now. I’m juggling learning how to hunt, fishing for my food, and trying to get a garden going in this god-forsaken desert I love to live in so much. I work all night shifts because I can’t with the turbulent day setting. Sleep is a unicorn in my life right now. The vast arguments in the air and displacement I get over the respiratory mask that I wear to combat the airborne chemical cleaners that trigger my asthmatic response and cause a litany of brain fog issues and mood swings for me – what once was thought to be ‘bipolar disorder’ was actually just a litany of reactions to things I was wearing or eating, using or getting exposed to. The mask debates and fights are absolutely ridiculous and getting convoluted from facts for the agenda of the masses who are blindly following media antics. The covid vaccine debates. I’m willing to take a leap and speak my mind on this COVID-19 all over again. I had COVID before the mandates and shutdowns took place. January all the way through March, almost April actually, I was fighting a terrible upper respiratory infection that just would not kick rocks. I was tested for pneumonia and other things only to later find out that I survived the notorious COVID-19 – naturally. No antibiotics, no inhalers, no Nyquil or Dayquil to get me through the symptoms or lighten the problem. The moment I thought Mucinex was a good idea, my body quickly reminded me that it just deteriorates my immune system further to take in anything with corn derivatives. I fought off COVID-19 with herbal teas, sleep, and a total dietary shift to all-natural, processed right in my kitchen, superfoods packed with herbs that contain nutritional content that helped my immune system get back on track and fight off that wretched virus. I only threw myself off track a month or two later eating out frequently. I won’t be doing that again. 

All the mandates and restrictions proposed are just absolutely ridiculous in my opinion. Not everyone can go to a doctors office safely without being faced with reactions to their allergies. Not everyone can trust their doctor and a lot of us end up having to educate our doctors about this allergy. I am one of the few who gave up on doctors and don’t even bother wasting my time and money – most questions I ask them I can find answers to through trial and error as well as researching away my days until I find the answer needed. Being a part of the corn allergy scene has taught me doctors don’t know anything past what they’re taught in schools and schools are not really there to teach us to think but to teach us to fall in line with narratives they push us to believe and run with. I remember when going to school for Visual communications the flood of advertising for medical workers was a huge thing. Now the medical industry is flooded with people who thought they’d be making more money than they are with student debt over their heads stressing them so much that your health is the last thing on their conscience at the end of the day. 

I want to vent here in this post a bit, with all the virtue-signaling going on and ‘inclusion’ crap being pushed around the country, no one is batting an eye at all the lies on and in our food, health, medical and hygiene products nor is anyone concerned with all these smelly biological altering chemicals being pumped through our air fresheners and cleaners. Lab-created chemicals that ‘help’ cut corners from actually eating real food or medicine through nutritious and healthy habits. It’s baffling to me how diluted our education system has gotten and how to mislead a whole 2-3 generations of people are when it comes down to accountability and responsibility. Nobody is responsible for you except you, yourself, and you. We’ve reached a point in society though that everyone is looking for ‘mommy and daddy’(government) to ‘give us’ what we want or ‘deserve’ and it’s just flat out disgusting to me. 

Nobody is responsible for your health, your food, your life, or any aspect of the choices you make with any of it. You are. Period. We need to collectively learn this and take our power back as individuals. Interdependence is what we need to be reaching for and getting away from these codependent survival thought processes that we’re collectively holding onto and pushing. We aren’t cavemen anymore but we should still know how to live out of our own backyards if it came down to it. It’s alarming how many people don’t even know where asparagus comes from or how it grows. I’ve even had teenagers tell me that banana peels aren’t biodegradable. It makes me crazy inside. More people can name off a litany of logos and companies than they can animals, plants, or even star constellations. These same people are clueless, basing their life off horoscopes and living mostly unhealthy in one way or another and if they are healthy they probably have a Rolodex of pills they’re on and off of with their doctor. Needlessly might I add? Doctors are no longer a guide for us but a pharmaceutical salesman pushing fancy drugs that these pharmaceutical companies push doctors to push onto us for bonus checks for their practices. If you don’t see a problem with that, then you are contributing to the problem by buying into it. 

There’s this “woke” culture going on but nobody is actually ‘woke’ – if they were we wouldn’t be fighting over skin color and statues from the olden days that built this country. There wouldn’t be all this rage over the media and social media wouldn’t be dictating so much of how we speak. We’d be worried about where our tax money is going and what’s being pumped into our food and medications in more detail and this country overall would be in a better disposition with its independence on its own resources and people’s abilities to work. It’s sad when I’m working in the grocery store and we get a new hire that isn’t a foreign person. We have this view that they’re going to be lazy – like most Americans today are. For example, I’ve seen more people from other countries who have earned their citizenship are always more often than not better workers in comparison to your average American worker who cries and complains over spilled milk and doing the task they were hired to do. They’ll opt to let the other person on the next shift do it rather than just get it done or do the right thing. Especially these younger generations. My own from the ’90s can be a bit taxing to deal with in their mindset as well. The ‘get them to do it for you’ attitude is real. Real laziness is flourishing hardcore and it appears that we’ve all lost our way and memory of how our ancestors got us here today. It is exactly why the current administration thinks they can push massive mandates and testing on a virus vaccine that isn’t their place to be making such a push. Educating the masses of its existence like they did ebola is all they should be doing and letting us handle it individually the way we see fit for ourselves. They can’t do that though because it has been effectively obvious that the lack of education both on our constitutional rights and mental attitude on how we are supposed to go about our lives has been largely diluted and poisoned with the mindset that someone else will do it or fix it for us. Our health included. It is the biggest lie and threat to freedom there is today. Many people think depression is curable by a pill rather than lifestyle and diet changes. Very rarely is a pill a fix-all for any situation. Many of our issues are created by our choices to keep chemical-laden products in our own faces day in and day out. From air fresheners to your hand sanitizers and soaps, hygiene products that throw off your metabolism and adrenal systems as well as your hormone levels.   

Politics aside and the numbers are thrown at us regarding COVID are all speculatory debates meant to divide and distract us from facts regarding our own personal power and potentials in creating our own healthy happy lives.

In all of this though, I see no avenue for us with the corn allergy to take a vaccine without some level of serious consequences for the more sensitive. Many people don’t realize the push for these vaccines is going hand in hand with some of these population control freaks that support killing babies before they’re born in the light of ‘it’s a woman’s right’. I suppose it’s just human nature to try and play god and control things outside of our legitimate control. I just want to point out the ingredients of just about every single OTC and even prescribed medication has some kind of delivery method base that is corn or chemical derived or synthesized/created. What makes you think the vaccine is going to be safe for me? For the vaccine pushers, they could give a crap less about my life. They want to make those like me the enemy for not taking the vaccine and also spewing all of these facts we’ve come to learn about our state of the world today in regards to health and food. I’m the crazy one, who sits here reading lots and lots, knows how to make my own food from scratch, and sidestep even the tiniest of a cold for 2 years as well as all these new strains of covid that keep coming out. I have not been sick outside of an allergy attack or response since I got over COVID-19 in 2020. My life matters just as much like yours and if you want to cry about me not getting the vaccine, let me know why my choice is actually seriously affecting your life? It’s not. It really isn’t. You’re regurgitating brainwashing nonsense if you think my choice not to get vaccinated is seriously affecting you on the other end of the screen here. Let me point out that there is not a cure for AIDS  and no vaccine for HIV yet either and it’s much more deadly in consequences than COVID could ever be, in my opinion. 

I think the Epstein Barr virus is a bigger issue than COVID as well. It is a silent killer that stacks onto your body a multitude of health dilemmas before triggering either an autoimmune disorder or cancer in your body. No doctor bats an eye at trying to help your body eliminate this or keep this virus suppressed, they just blindly are making money for the pharma industries off of the litany of pills they push your way to bandage the litany of thyroid, gut, and immune system issues it triggers through time living with it. About 90% of people come into contact or contract it and another high percentage is dealing with problems from it but never told that their EBV dormancy in their system has reactivated and contributed to their thyroid failure or IBS or sudden autoimmune disorder onslaught. MS and Lupus are both linked to EBV and so are lymphoma-type cancers. All 3 of those are hugely popular in the medical world right now and go to diagnosis for mystery issues. I even had a doctor try scaring me into thinking I had lymphoma – it was really just the corn allergy development and my body not being the typical standard human body reacting to allergies like normal allergies studied. My body actually acts like it has an autoimmune disorder and will attack itself days after a corn exposure and these attacks can last a week or two, sometimes more. Sometimes they’re mild and tolerable and other times they are crippling – literally. 

Anyway – I could go on all day on this stuff but I’ve made my point here pretty clear. I don’t support the attitude of ‘fix it for me or do it for me’ nor do I support the idea of vaccine mandates. I will always push independent thought processes. I don’t agree with the mainstream narratives being pushed. They’re as misleading as the advertising industry on food saying “All natural!”. I don’t think you should be leaning on doctors’ guidance for pill usage so much as you should be getting to know your own body and it’s needs naturally and finding ways to obtain these things through natural means rather than through lazier means that leave you open to being a guinea pig. 

In my upcoming posts, I’ll be getting back into my Corn-tamination series or corn allergy awareness graphics. I am also now taking requests again for graphics and products. I can do stickers, flyers, business cards, the whole nine yards but I am attempting to really focus and gather all the information I can from public sources online on how items on the corn derivatives list that we dodge as corn allergy people are made or how exactly they are corn contaminated. I’ve been finding this information rather elusive or difficult to find for the lab-created and synthesized elements, I guess it’s not cool for their business to let us know exactly how they make this stuff. It’s come down to a conclusion that anything made in a lab is likely corn chemical contaminated in one-way shape or form. Though some derivatives are actually naturally occurring and not always made in a lab or from corn. I’ll be uploading some graphics soon enough, everything is still slow-moving for me as my time consumption and management now involve juggling in fishing and hunting for my own food. 

This corn allergy has unveiled to me that I can’t even buy store-bought meats except from Circle C Farms who only uses apple cider vinegar and water for their acid washes on their meats they sell. It’s god awful expensive too for meat for me… so in an effort to cut some costs, increase my physical health and expand my diet, I’m now learning how to hunt and fish on top of trying to keep plants alive in the heart of this Arizona desert I live in AND work a job to keep the bills paid and a roof over my head. Talk about juggling what feels like impossible tasks. Converting from the “Fix it for me, rescue me.” attitude to the “I got this, I’ll do it myself.” is not easy. I complain about all that I did above because I used to be just as clueless and entitled as the rest of the country who are screaming at everyone like Nazis to get a vaccine they don’t trust. And rightfully so, do not trust that vaccine or the administration’s agenda at hand. Something IS NOT RIGHT HERE! 

Respectfully – I’ll agree to disagree with anyone who disagrees with these statements regarding COVID. I’m no healthcare professional but I speak from my own experiences and personal development standpoints. I’ve lost a few friends this past year who had the vaccine and oddly enough, they were fine up until after they had the vaccine. Hmmm… I wonder… nonetheless I have to keep trudging through and I will follow my gut instincts to avoid this with my life if I have to. I will fight for my right to choose and I will gladly die for it if it comes down to it. Over my dead body will you be sticking a vaccine in my arm that I don’t trust or agree with.

I have a long way to go to really becoming independent on my food and other resources but it’s become more than pertinent that I must because for those with a corn allergy – there is no knight in shining armor coming to save us from the corn in the industry and there is no company out there that is actually going to be honest and transparent on their products 100% of the time. I look for the day but I’m not counting on it to happen. It is a unicorn, that ‘corn-free, corn allergy labeled’ requirement. Corn has too much money and hand in too many industries to go down and much like our rights to decide what’s good for our health nowadays, we don’t get to decide how honest companies are going to be with us. We’re all just guinea pigs here in my opinion, especially if you’re not making your own food and herbal medicines yourself. 

All food for thought – open for debates and speculation if you so desire. I suggest heavily researching anything in question and don’t just run with the first few articles google spews off to you. Research takes a good few minutes to do properly. You’re no expert if you just do a quick google search and read. Remember, these search engines and social media apps are tailored to what you or ‘they’ want you to see and believe, not what you need to think for yourself. Just food for thought when you’re out there searching for answers if you are one who does such!

So… no further ado, I’ll be working through the calcium derivatives this upcoming week and should have some posted in the next few weeks. Keep an eye on my Reddit page or Facebook and Instagram pages for free awareness graphics you can save and share away. We need more awareness and if you’re going to be part of a virtue-signaling party, help us out too. Don’t just go plastering #metoo or some other hashtag movement everywhere so carelessly and keep purchasing from large companies that support and play into trafficking on the down-low. Support local, support mom and pop shops, and spread education where you can about those who are seriously left out of the overall social heard. #cornallergy life isn’t even remotely easy nor is society even remotely inclusive to our needs for products that are both affordable and safe for us.

World of Randoms

Chapter 20 – Depression or Decision

Motivation lacking, she yells for me to rise up…

I just glaze my eyes up to hers, and ask what’s up? 

“Get up! Get out of bed!”

“Why, what’s the point?” the lazy and depression laden voice responds. Hollowed out inside. Gutted from the thoughts…or lack thereof. The lack of motivation is deeply laced with the grips of a demon named depression, rooted deep on the inside.

Maybe there’s a reason why you don’t want to get up today. Or any other day for that matter. Maybe you don’t know the reason? And even if you did, what could you do differently? What the world difference does it make? And if you do stir, all you do is somehow find that escape again. That outlet of disappearing on the inside, sidestepping the feelings of handling that boulder up off your shoulders. 

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World of Randoms

Chapter 19 – Who is She?

To strike that note, make that sound. Who would know how well they would flow? 

And As she stood up, I sat down and started to write. 

“Oh what a sight, she’s taking flight!” 

Oh what a scene to see, a girl just figured out how to handle her world! 

Nothing is handed to us when we’re born, not even our parents or gender, nor our skin color, location, family generation, none of it. We haven’t a choice in the world on the day we’re born, or so we think or are led to believe. What if there is so much more we have yet to understand, to yet conceive? What if there’s that missing piece in the beginning to our understanding. Well, it is, to say the least, no one is handed a handbook on how to live their specific life or raise that specific child. 

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World of Randoms

Chapter 18 – Welcome: The Neverending Sections

Each chapter released from this point, if you have noticed since we figured out we were trapped in a section, is Randomly spoken. There is no storyline here. We have no storyline in this place. You have to understand something, the artist putting these chapters together isn’t really focused on any one thing. Can you tell? If not, then that’s fine. We’re here now, you, me, myself and I. This book wasn’t written to make sense, the end of the book was written in Chapter 5…Remember me? Just a character in an everlasting shared dream who disappeared. This is our lives here, we’re all interconnected. This is a bit of history on these pages too. Not mine, but you know, someones, somewhere, somehow, it was a reality out there in this big cruel world. At some point. In someone’s life, maybe not ours. 

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World of Randoms

Chapter 17 – A Teens Note of Revelation


‘I’m stuck in this space, it’s my space and mine alone. It’s the only place I can be alone without feeling like I’m all alone. 

I don’t want out of this place either, it’s peaceful here. No drama. Nothing to create any new trauma. 

And this is all because I’m still working through the previous traumas. I’m simply not accepting anything new that could misconstrue what I’ve been through. Nobody but me knows what I’ve been through, and only I can know what was true. 

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World of Randoms

Chapter 16 – Wanting Out

It trips me out every time. Sitting on a beach, it’s supposed to be relaxing, but it’s just full of all these grains of sand…shells…it’s windy. Wet…messy and not to mention you can’t hear a thing past the ocean crashing in with the winds. I’m sitting in front of the great birthing pool of everything larger than all our individual lives combined. Things exist in those waters that could swallow you and me whole in one gulp. Things exist in those waters that have stung me…damn jellies. So illusively beautiful, yet some are so very deadly. Of all the things we could die from, you could die from a floating blob of gelatinous venom. Or something with 8 arms of nothing but pure masculine muscle, with a grasp that can rip your limbs off. Beaks so powerful…it’s painful to reflect on some of the images I’ve picked up in these shore sands. 

I met that one girl on the beach eons ago. She wasn’t here, but her voice, I could hear. Talk about the oddities in life. Looking back, we could say children are supernaturally sensitive. When you listen to ghost stories, you think you’re crazy. Maybe you are? Sure did give a different insight into life. All the different ways you can live it. Maybe a lot of different ways to end it too. 

If I could go back, a generation…and give my mother some advice when she was pregnant with me…what would I advise? If I had to answer, I’d tell her to not change a god damn thing. Live it as you lived it. I wouldn’t change a damn thing in my life. My angels, my demons, my lessons, my heathens, my lovers, my mother. I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I wouldn’t tell her a damn thing, it’d affect my life too much. Call me selfish…but I wish her well, I wish her nothing but pure happiness. 

A memory flashes through, a mother and daughter sharing an abnormal moment in a small bathroom, located in a small house in a small town in a small place in a small window of time. Oh under this limelight we can see into their hearts, both in great strife and pain. One angry and confused, the other lost and deeply troubled… The mother laying in a tub of water, tears in her eyes. In this small house, they only have one bathroom to share. The daughter has to pee so she’s in there just to do that. Her mother with her head almost submerged emerges enough to tremble some words, she’s crying…

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